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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24320359">akogare</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/cup_of_comfort/pseuds/cup_of_comfort'>cup_of_comfort</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>King's Raid (Video Game)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Emotional Sex, Hurt/Comfort, M/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 04:48:43</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>4,870</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24320359</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/cup_of_comfort/pseuds/cup_of_comfort</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>it’s raining hard, no soul in sight outside; but a lone figure dashes through the night—<i>Lucias</i>. —esker/lucias</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Esker/Lucias (King's Raid)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>30</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>akogare</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>a commission done for <a href="https://twitter.com/rialynkv">rialynkv</a>. Thank you so much <span class="small"><strike>for plunging me into this pairing roflmao</strike></span>!!!!!</p><p>this actually was planned to be written longer but the rest of the plot was cut off so this becomes PWP... it also didn't come out as emotional as i wanted it to be. oh well, i'll compensate it in the next piece!</p><p>meanwhile, enjoy esker &amp; lucias's dirty deeds here (≧∀≦) comments are appreciated!</p><p> </p><p>  <span class="small"><br/>    <span class="small">憧れ (あこがれ) ——— yearnings</span><br/>  </span></p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The storm hadn't shown signs of stopping even until the evening fell, each raindrop drumming onto surfaces like an unrelenting parade—forcing people to stay indoors at the dark night. A lone figure, however, dashed through the city with laboured breaths; not even once slowing down even as the rain beat onto him and soaked him down to the bones.</p><p>It was Lucias—the Saint of Blessings, High Priest of the Goddess Lua.</p><p>Water splashed around him with each step, mud caking his boots and the hem of his pure-white coat, but Lucias seemed to pay it no attention. Clutched in his hand was a crumpled piece of letter, half-wet from the rain—but the ink stayed intact, a single sentence penned inside.</p><p>[ <em> I'll be waiting for you at the inn. </em> ]</p><p>Hero's Inn—the only inn in Orvel—was a place where a lot of people usually gathered; however, as Lucias drew closer to the inn, he realised that there was actually no soul in sight around the inn, unlike the usual.</p><p>That was, aside from a man with light blue hair, who was currently leaning against the wall under the front porch—which offered next to none protection against the storm—as he absent-mindedly rolled something in his right hand. Upon hearing Lucias's steps as he climbed up the stairs to the front deck, he lifted his head, and purple eyes widened when he saw Lucias.</p><p>The man stood up straighter. "You—!"</p><p>"...E-Esker," Lucias gasped, still trying to regulate his breath and contain his emotions as he stepped closer. "Esker, is that really—"</p><p>"You<em> idiot</em>!"</p><p>Before Lucias had the chance to finish his sentence, the man—Esker, as Lucias called him earlier—had already pulled him into the inn, away from the storm. Puddles of water soon gathered beneath Lucias, who was completely soaked from head to toe. His blond hair, usually neatly combed, was now a matted mess, dripping down water onto the floor.</p><p>"Welcome to the Hero's—oh dear," Juno, the chef and the innkeeper, who was currently standing behind the receptionist desk, gasped in surprise as both Esker and Lucias barged into the lobby looking as drenched as drowned rats. "Let me fetch you some towels!"</p><p>"It's alright, Juno, you don't have to—" Esker started, but Juno had already disappeared into the door behind the receptionist, leaving Esker and Lucias alone with the latter shivering and clutching his upper arms.</p><p>Esker clicked his tongue and pulled Lucias closer towards the heater in the lobby. "What the <em> hell </em> are you thinking?" He turned to face the blond and hissed, but despite the harsh words his gloved hand caressed Lucias's cheek gently. Lucias unconsciously closed his eyes and nuzzled into Esker's hand, basking in the warmth of the other man. "Gods, you're freezing."</p><p>"I was afraid... I-I'll miss you if I w-waited for the rain to l-let up," Lucias answered, teeth clattering at each word spoken. "I c-can't... pass the o-opportunity."</p><p>"That doesn't mean you can run all the way from the church to here under the storm!" The younger man scolded him. Lucias was about to reply when Juno showed up again, bringing a large towel with her on one hand and a small tray with two steaming mugs on the other.</p><p>"Dry yourself off; I also get you two a mug of hot cocoa each, on the house," she sighed dramatically as she handed the towel to Lucias. "You travellers are such a handful sometimes."</p><p>"I appreciate it, Juno. Thanks," Esker took the tray from Juno's hand and grasped Lucias's hand in his other hand. "Let's go to my room—this way, Lucias."</p><p>Lucias gave Juno a small, apologetic nod before he was whisked away by Esker. Wordlessly, he followed the younger man towards the room, which was only a small space with one bed and a table and chair set—after all, Juno's inn wasn't intended for people who would stay longer than three days. Most people frequented this place to simply catch a brief shut-eye before continuing their journey and to taste Juno's infamous cooking.</p><p>Esker shut the door behind him and put the tray on the desk, turning on the heater in the room before he approached Lucias. "Here, let me help you," he said, removing Lucias's dirty robe from his shoulders and let it fall into a soppy heap on the floor. He took the towel from Lucias's hand and rubbed it on the pale blond hair, clicking his tongue when Lucias let out a sneeze. "Seriously... You're an idiot; did you know that?"</p><p>"I think you've told me a couple of times already," Lucias sniffled, but there was a smile carved on his pale face. "But I don't regret it. I get to meet you in the end—after all this time I've been looking for you."</p><p>Esker's hands stopped and his expression became tense. "...you should change your clothes," he said, changing the subject abruptly. "Strip; I'll give you my spare clothes."</p><p>Lucias felt the disappointment settle in when Esker's warmth left him, but he complied—he didn't want to catch a cold, after all. He could almost imagine Baudouin's mocking laughter if the older man knew he caught a cold by running through the storm.</p><p>He unbuttoned his wet shirt and pants and let them join his robe on the floor, shivering a little. Esker had put the clothes on the bed—Lucias noticed that he had also stripped down, wearing only his undershirt and pants and currently sitting on the bed. Silently he picked up the change of clothes and turned his back towards Esker, wearing the shorts first and the shirt next, as he felt Esker's eyes burning onto his back—undoubtedly staring at the stigmata carved onto his back.</p><p>"Does it hurt?" Esker broke the silence, so suddenly that it almost surprised Lucias.</p><p>"Huh?" Lucias blinked.</p><p>"The stigmata," Esker said. "Does it hurt when it first appeared?"</p><p>"...oh," Lucias shook his head and sat down on the chair, hand reaching for the mug in an attempt to warm his hands further. "It doesn't hurt. Although to be honest... I didn't even feel anything when it appeared because I passed out for three days, according to the others. The stigmata gave me fever and nightmares." The older man shuddered at the memory. It wasn't exactly a pleasant experience.</p><p>Esker didn't give a response, but Lucias could see his brows furrowing, arms folded in front of his chest, seemingly deep in thought. They fell into another awkward silence with the sound of rain hitting the window panes in the background—until finally Lucias couldn't take it anymore.</p><p>"Why did you call me here tonight, Esker?" He asked, mismatched eyes staring intensely at the younger man.</p><p>Esker stayed silent.</p><p>"I've been hearing rumours all over the city," Lucias continued. "The rebellions that had been happening in Orvel—they said it was instigated by a blue-haired gambler with violet eyes." He gripped his mug tightly. "It wasn't you... was it, Esker?"</p><p>"...what if I said it <em> was </em> me?"</p><p>Lucias breathed in sharply. "Then I say that you're lying to me."</p><p>He heard Esker snort. "On what basis do you think I'm lying to you?" Esker kept his voice playful, but Lucias could almost hear the irate under his tone.</p><p>"Because I know you, Esker," Lucias replied tensely. "The Esker I know wouldn't even do something like that."</p><p>The light in Esker's eyes dimmed. He averted his gaze away from Lucias. "It doesn't matter anymore," he mumbled. "...the Esker you <em> knew </em> was long dead."</p><p>"Dammit, Esker—stop avoiding my question and just answer me!" Lucias stood up abruptly, knocking the mugs off and strided towards the bed as he pulled on Esker's shirt. "What's your purpose? Did you really do it?!"</p><p>"Take your hands <em> off </em> me, Lucias," Esker growled, his eyes glinted dangerously. "I didn't want to hurt you."</p><p>They stared fiercely at each other for a couple of seconds until Lucias let him go, albeit reluctantly. "...I'm sorry," he stepped away, but Esker's hand pulled him back.</p><p>"Sit down here," he gestured for Lucias to settle on the space beside him on the bed. It was a tight fit—considering that they were two grown-up adults and how small the bed was—but Lucias complied, scooting beside Esker and trying to make himself as comfortable as possible. He was prepared for another round of awkward silence, but that didn't happen.</p><p>"...I have only one purpose now," Esker started, "and it's to take revenge on the person who ruined my life."</p><p>Lucias lifted his head to look at Esker’s face. When they were young, Esker wasn’t exactly someone whom you can call as ‘friendly’—he frowned a lot, got mad at Lucias a lot—but he could feel the happiness that radiated from the younger male. Now, it was as if Lucias was looking at a different Esker—purple eyes that burned with hatred and determination, and the expression that gave off a hint of despair, sadness, and loneliness—</p><p>Perhaps Esker was telling the truth when he said that the Esker Lucias <em> knew </em> had been dead.</p><p>"Revenge?" Lucias found himself asking. "Against <em> who </em>?"</p><p>Esker closed his eyes and breathed out. "The Prime Minister of Orvel."</p><p>The High Priest widened his eyes. "You mean... Minister El Moriham?" He whispered. It wasn't exactly a secret within the government that the prime minister wasn't a good man—he made enemies in dangerous places and cut shady deals—the assassination attempt on Princess Scarlet just a year ago might also be his doing, pulling strings from the shadows to prevent any of the surviving royal family to ascend the throne. But... What had the prime minister done to Esker, something that made the man want to take revenge on?</p><p>Esker chuckled. "Who else?" His right hand fiddled with something again—only now that Lucias realised that it was a pair of twin dice. "He framed me for something I didn't do and forced me to go into hiding, living my life like a rat in the shadows," Esker gritted his teeth, unwittingly gripped the dice tighter. "But he'll pay for it now."</p><p>"Esker—" Lucias's voice caught in his throat. The rebellions were the reason he and all the priests of Lua were called back to Orvel—especially him, since he was also a former knight. The order issued for them was to defend Orvel, quell the riot and capture the person instigating the rebellion. Lucias didn't believe that Esker was the culprit, but his unwillingness to answer Lucias made the priest anxious. What if it was true?</p><p>Esker seemed to catch on Lucias's anxiety. "What is it?" He asked. "Wondering why I told you—the High Priest himself—all of these?"</p><p>Lucias had a lot of things to ask—<em> beg </em>, even—from Esker, but he opted not to. "I just—I just want to say..." He took a deep breath and grasped Esker's sleeve. "...please, don't do it, Esker. Your revenge—whatever it is. Please don't do it."</p><p>"And why shouldn't I?" Esker replied back. "I'll have my revenge one way or another."</p><p>Lucias bit his lower lip. "You don't have to do this, Esker. You said the old Esker I knew no longer existed—" he said, "—but that doesn't matter. <em> You </em> are the Esker I know now; the one I've been looking for. And I don't want—" Lucias inhaled sharply, "—I don't want to lose you again."</p><p>The look Esker had was unreadable. "...I <em> have </em> to do this," he muttered, avoiding Lucias's stare. "Only then can I find my peace."</p><p>Lucias knew there was nothing further he could do to make Esker change his mind. If that's the case, then...</p><p>Esker’s breath hitched when Lucias moved to straddle him, pinning him to the wall so he couldn’t escape. “What are you doing?” He breathed out.</p><p>“If I can’t make you change your mind,” Lucias said, “then let me at least remember you at this moment.”</p><p>“What the—" Esker attempted to push Lucias off him, but despite the priest's slim figure, Lucias was actually pretty heavy, not budging the slightest. "Are you out of your mind?! Get off me!"</p><p>"No!" Lucias yelled back. "If I don't do this then the next time I see you will be on the battlefield, as enemies—and I don't want that to be the memory I have of the current you!"</p><p>"<em> Basta— </em>" Esker gritted his teeth and mustered the power to push Lucias down to the bed and pin both of his hands down, the bed creaking loudly in protest from the force. "Why would you care anyway?" He asked, narrowing his eyes as if trying to discern Lucias's intention. "We haven't met for ten years—we have basically reduced back to strangers now. What's your intention?"</p><p>Lucias was taken aback. "I—how could you just say that we're—<em> strangers </em> ?" His voice trembled. "When you started sending me birthday wishes, all I think about is why won't you come see me, despite already knowing where to find me," Lucias clenched his fists. "I was— <em> ecstatic </em> . You remembered that I loved your tricks and magic, and most of all; you remembered my <em> birthday </em>." Lucias's expression twisted into sadness. "You're precious to me, Esker—and will always be."</p><p>Violet eyes bored into his own mismatched ones, but Lucias was determined not to let himself be intimidated—until Esker finally relaxed and let out a sigh. "You..." His grip on Lucias's wrists slackened and he leaned down to rest his head on Lucias's shoulder. "...you never change, do you?"</p><p>Slowly, Lucias smiled. He moved his arms to cradle Esker's head, feeling the soft, light-blue strands between his fingers and secretly inhaling Esker's smooth, musky scent. "Then I'm glad that I'm still me," he chuckled, "and I'm glad that you're also still you."</p><p>Esker lifted his head and hovered over Lucias, hand touching the priest's jaw lightly and tilted his face slightly up, running a finger on Lucias's lower lip.</p><p>Lucias didn't even have enough time to wonder what Esker was up to when the other male bent down to kiss him, a knee pressed up between his legs. His hands immediately flew to grab on Esker's upper arms, blunt nails scratching the skin as the illusionist deepened the kiss.</p><p>As Lucias thought he was about to faint from the lack of breath—and from the embarrassment to top it off—Esker broke the kiss, a trail of saliva left between their lips before disappearing. "What..." Lucias breathed out heavily, eyes hazy. "...what are you doing, Esker?"</p><p>Esker paused, a confused look on his face. "What do you mean, 'what I am doing'? Isn't this what you mean when you said you want to remember me?"</p><p>Now it was Lucias's turn to get confused. "I don't understand..."</p><p>Esker sighed. "I mean by having sex."</p><p>Lucias's pale cheeks turned red in record speed. "I-I don't mean it like that!" The blond stammered.</p><p>Esker raised an eyebrow. "So... You don't want to have sex with me?"</p><p>"I do!" Lucias quickly blurted out, then blushed when he realised what he had replied. Strangely, it wasn't because he felt weirded out about the idea of having sex with Esker—it was more of the embarrassment of having no experience to sex; moreover, because it was <em> Esker </em> he was about to have sex with. "...I do," he repeated with a smaller voice, squeezing Esker's arms.</p><p>Esker seemed to catch on. "Don't worry about it," he whispered, brushing Lucias's hair back gently. "Let me."</p><p>Lucias closed his eyes as Esker kissed him again, shuddering when the illusionist's hands slipped beneath his shirt and touched the skin directly. Every caress sent tingles on Lucias's spine, and he unconsciously sighed between kisses, curling his fingers. "...it tickles," he murmured into the kiss.</p><p>The younger male chuckled. "It's just the beginning," he told Lucias as his hand pushed the shirt up and brushed against a nipple. Lucias gasped, but Esker didn't stop—his lips ghosted against Lucias's jawline, trailing lower to bite on the juncture of his neck, earning a yelp from Lucias.</p><p>Lucias squirmed as Esker's free hand slipped on his backside and dipped into his shorts, while the younger's lips trailed kisses and hickeys on his neck and chest. The priest had his breath knocked out of him when large hands fondled his ass and fingertips ghosting through the crack. "E-Esker," he gripped Esker's arms tighter, and let out a surprised yelp when a callused finger brushed through his hole, teasing.</p><p>Lucias could hear Esker humming in amusement. "What's wrong?" He asked teasingly, smirking—Lucias really wanted to punch that smirk off his face.</p><p>"...you talk too much," Lucias pouted, but he whimpered as Esker's finger rubbed gently, more persistently. "Hurry up..."</p><p>Esker licked his lips at Lucias's request and he straightened up, his eyes clouding with lust and want. His nimble fingers slid Lucias's shorts off with one swift movement—Lucias didn't even have the time to protest nor realise what had happened—and spreaded the blond's legs open. He reached for his pocket and took out a small vial of oil, drizzling some onto his hand.</p><p>"I won't stop even if you beg me to later, <em> Lucias </em>," Esker breathed out his name with such intensity, making the priest shudder. A slick finger probed back on his hole before slipping in, and Lucias's breath hitched at the chill. He curled his toes and clenched his eyes shut, face flushed from embarrassment.</p><p>Esker was being careful with him, Lucias could tell. Having something up your ass felt weird, but it was bearable—Lucias could take more than this. "...don't stop, then," he circled his arms around the illusionist's neck. "I want to remember you tonight, so don't stop."</p><p>Esker's purple eyes glinted dangerously. Another finger quickly joined the first, and Lucias gasped when Esker didn't bother to be gentle anymore, thrusting the digits in fast and spreaded Lucias open, hooking his fingers inside to try and find something.</p><p>Lucias covered his mouth with a hand to muffle his moans, but Esker growled and took his hand away, pinning it back to the bed. "Don't cover it up," he demanded. "Let your voice out."</p><p>The priest wanted to protest, but it quickly turned into a squeak when Esker's fingers hit the spot inside him, grazing his nail against it, prodding lightly. The blond's cock twitched, dripping precum onto his stomach.</p><p>When Esker removed his fingers, Lucias opened his eyes and breathed heavily, mismatched eyes watched as the illusionist unbuttoned his pants and pulled out his own cock, drizzling more oil onto his palm and gave the length a couple of strokes. He pushed both of Lucias's legs back and the blond could feel the blunt head of his cock pressing on the rim; unconsciously he tensed, toes curling in both anticipation and fear.</p><p>The illusionist cradled the back of Lucias's head and bent down to kiss him as he slid in. Lucias let out small moans between their kisses as Esker kept pushing in—it didn't hurt as much as Lucias braced himself for, but it was uncomfortable since Esker was bigger than he had anticipated.</p><p>"You alright...?" Esker whispered. His voice was strained, his long fingers clenching down on Lucias's pale blond locks almost painfully. </p><p>"Keep going..." Lucias replied, hooking his legs on Esker's back. "I'm not as delicate as you think I am, Esker... It's okay, I can take it."</p><p>"Hah—" Esker snorted in amusement. "You sure have a lot of confidence, for someone inexperienced."</p><p>Lucias glared at him. "I am <em> not </em> inexperienced," he retorted back, pouting. Esker probably could see through his lie, but he was determined not to let it show. He couldn't lose to Esker, after all.</p><p>"Yes, yes..." Esker chuckled. His gaze softened as he stroked Lucias's flushed cheeks fondly. Esker withdrew his hips back and thrusted in again with a snap, and Lucias gasped at the force.</p><p>"Esker...!" Lucias's eyes watered and he whimpered each time Esker thrusted. Every movement set the growing heat pooling beneath his stomach, threatening to spill at any moment. His hand sneaked below to touch at his leaking cock, but Esker caught it in his own hand, pinning it back. Lucias whined in frustration.</p><p>"Not yet," Esker rasped. "Finish with me."</p><p>Lucias almost sobbed at that. The pressure kept building inside as Esker hit his prostate, until he couldn't take it anymore. "Please, <em> please </em> ," Lucias gasped, hips jerking to meet with Esker's. "Esker, <em> please </em>..."</p><p>"Gh—!" Esker gritted his teeth and tightened his grip against Lucias's hand; his free hand closed around Lucias's cock, and with only a few strokes the blond came with a cry, cum splattering over his stomach. Esker himself only needed a few more thrusts before he came with a curse under his breath, heat filling Lucias's insides.</p><p>They stayed still for a while, clutching at each other, only their heavy breathings filling the room. Esker braced himself so he wouldn't crush Lucias under his weight.</p><p>"...are you alright?" Esker broke the silence, stroking Lucias's messy blond hair away from his face.</p><p>Lucias nodded, still hadn't quite found his voice yet. His hips and legs felt numb, and his stomach was still tingling from the afterglow sensation.</p><p>Esker lifted himself up and slowly withdrew from Lucias, and the blond visibly winced at the ache that shot from his ass. He grimaced when he felt wetness trickling down the hole.</p><p>Lucias could feel the younger male left the bed and instantly panicked. He didn't want Esker to leave his side, <em> not yet </em> . "Esker—" he called and tried getting off the bed, attempting to follow Esker, but his legs had no strength and he fell down on the floor with a loud <em> thump </em>, startling Esker.</p><p>"What are you doing?!" The illusionist approached Lucias and kneeled down, supporting the priest back to the bed. "Stay still."</p><p>"No," Lucias clutched on the younger's arms when Esker let him go. "Don't leave; at least not yet. Please..."</p><p>Esker sighed. "I'm not going anywhere," he said, pulling the blond into his arms and surprising Lucias. "Calm down; you need some rest, don't strain yourself too much."</p><p>Lucias was reluctant to let him go, but Esker made him lie back on the bed while he fetched the towel Lucias used to dry himself earlier. It was still damp, and Esker wiped down the stains on Lucias's stomach with it, as well as the mess behind. Lucias hissed even when Esker dabbed gently, making the illusionist's face turn grim.</p><p>"You're hurting," he said. "Why didn't you say so?"</p><p>"It doesn't hurt," Lucias insisted. "It feels really good, Esker. Just... because it <em> is </em> my first time..." He bit his lower lip, embarrassed. "This... probably isn't your first, is it?"</p><p>"What, having sex?" Esker inquired, to which Lucias nodded shyly. His lips curled into a smirk. "Do you want to know, or <em> really </em> want to know?"</p><p>"Esker," Lucias pouted, warning tone in his voice.</p><p>Esker gave a small chuckle, before his expression became somber. "You're also my first, actually."</p><p>Lucias snorted. "I don't believe you."</p><p>"For the love of Lua, Lucias, you're my first... and only," Esker stroked Lucias's cheek with his thumb, gazing at him tenderly. For a second it felt like Lucias had his breath stolen away—he had never seen Esker like that, even when they were little.</p><p>The magic of the moment was shattered when Esker removed his hand, his face back to the somber, almost sad expression. Lucias watched as he bent down on the floor to pick up Lucias's sopping wet clothes and hung them on the chair, sighing at the puddles of rainwater and spilled cocoa on the floor.</p><p>"Ah—" Lucias paused. He caused all those mess—Juno's not going to be happy about it. The priest pushed himself up from the bed, only to grimace when pain shot up his waist.</p><p>Esker quickly approached Lucias. "Dammit, Lucias, I said <em> stay still </em>," he growled. "If you're worried about the mess, I'll handle it with Juno in the morning."</p><p>Lucias's expression brightened at that. "So... You'll stay with me until morning comes?"</p><p>Esker cleared his throat. "...I did say I'm not going anywhere," he said awkwardly. "So be a good boy and just lie down."</p><p>"About that..." Lucias smiled. He offered his hand towards Esker. "Give me a little of your magic, Esker."</p><p>The illusionist blinked, but he obeyed, putting his hand over Lucias's. With a small incantation, light enveloped the blond, his mismatched eyes turning into bright gold until finally the light faded as Lucias closed his eyes. When he opened them again, they had turned back to the original lavender and blue. "...what did you do?" Esker asked.</p><p>"Rejuvenation spell," Lucias smiled. "The Goddess's Blessing sure is handy for things like this, don't you think?"</p><p>The illusionist gaped at him before laughing. "You really never changed," he climbed onto the bed and laid down beside Lucias, pulling the blond into a hug and held him almost tenderly. Perhaps because Esker had felt more comfortable with him. Slowly, Esker's fingers trailed on the stigmata peeking from under Lucias's shirt, making the priest shudder. "Ten years, and now you've become Lua's High Priest, the Saint of Blessings," he murmured. "I wondered whether the goddess will rain punishment down on me for defiling her high priest?" He chuckled, before pausing. "Not that I haven't gotten enough punishments already."</p><p>Lucias snuggled into the illusionist's hold, his head placed under Esker's head and their legs tangling together. "Hush," he shushed. "If the stigmata's still there, then I take it that the goddess isn't mad at you. ...or me," he added thoughtfully. He then tilted his head up to face Esker. "What about you? The Illusion Gambler... I've heard of you for so long, yet in my trips around the continent, not even once I found you, no matter how hard I looked."</p><p>"It's not your fault; <em> I </em> chose not to be found," Esker tightened his grip on Lucias's thin frame, but still careful not to crush him. "Obtaining Hexipolia enabled me to have the power I need, but it came at a great cost."</p><p>He opened up his palm and summoned the pair of dice Lucias had seen him with before. "Is that what you've been doing after you—disappeared?" Lucias asked. He still remembered that day, just before he was summoned for the knight training. Stardust had finally come to his small hometown after another year, but when Lucias came to see their show, Esker was nowhere to be found. When he tried asking Ophelia, the fortune reader of the troupe, afterwards, she just shook her head sadly and said Esker had disappeared.</p><p>"I wandered for some time afterwards," Esker murmured. "Trying to find my footings back, but it's hard. Stardust is my family; I missed everyone, and I missed you too." Esker pressed his nose on Lucias's hair, inhaling the blond's scent. "I was alone and young and vulnerable; the dice took advantage of it. I don't regret the path I walk now... It's just I wish that I could meet you in a better circumstance."</p><p>"Esker..." Lucias clenched his fingers. "You don't have to do this anymore. You can go with me to the church; I'll keep you safe—"</p><p>"No," Esker outright rejected. "I have to. I've said it before, Lucias; only when I have my revenge that I can find my peace."</p><p>His words sounded more hollow now as he squeezed Lucias to the point it almost hurt, as if he didn't want to let Lucias go. In return, Lucias said nothing, closed his eyes and sighed as he did his best to comfort Esker with his touches.</p><p>He trailed light kisses over Esker's chest and slowly rolled them so the illusionist was lying on his back, Lucias getting on him. Esker raised a curious eyebrow.</p><p>"What are you thinking, Lucias?"</p><p>Lucias breathed out. "I don't want you to go," he said. "I want to be with you. If you won't come with me, then I'll co—"</p><p>Esker quickly shut him up with a kiss. "...don't," he quietly said. "Don't say something you'll regret later."</p><p>The blond drew in a sharp breath. It was like Esker had read his mind; he pressed his forehead against the younger male. "Then... Let's do it again. And again, as long as the time allows us to," he whispered. "I want to remember you as much as I can."</p><p>Esker blinked a few times—apparently speechless that Lucias could suggest such thing—but his eyes softened after a while, bringing Lucias's hands to his lips and kissed each finger gently. "Take whatever you need," he said. "I'm all yours; just for tonight."</p><p>"As I am yours, too," Lucias rasped, trying to hold back his tears. "Even if it's just for tonight..."</p><p>The blond bent down to kiss Esker as they stripped each other bare once more and let themselves drown in heat as the night went by, until even their heartbeats became one.</p><p>The rain never once stopped that night, as if becoming the embodiment of their pain of yearnings for each other.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>come talk to me at <a href="https://twitter.com/cup_of_comfort">twitter</a>!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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